Ask an Author: Handling Rejection and Failure

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Publishing is a TOUGH industry, especially for unknown aspiring authors. Whether you are looking to traditionally publish through a small press or a big five publisher, expect a road filled with far more nos than yesses. This can have a devastating effect on the unprepared writer. Here are some tips for handling rejection and failure while in the querying process. 

1. Expect rejection

You know that saying that if you expect the worst, you won't be surprised when it happens? Well, as pessimistic as it is, this is great advice for the querying writer. Very, very few writers will be accepted by the first agent or publisher they query. I was so sure everyone would love my book and that the querying process would be easy 😆. I wish I had been better prepared mentally for those first few rejections. 

2. Accept critical feedback--but only when it works for you

Most rejections I received were form rejections: polite, generic emails stating that the book was not a good fit for the agent's list. But once in a while, I received a line or two of specific feedback directed toward my manuscript. One agent said that the premise of my novel was intriguing but she didn't connect with the characters as much as she had hoped. Though I was disappointed in the rejection, I took the feedback to heart and reworked my opening chapters. And the agent was right--the final manuscript was much better than the version she read.

Alternately, I received feedback from an agent that beginning my story from an adult's point of view was dissatisfying to them. I love my opening chapter and the foundation it lays for the rest of my novel, so I chose to ignore that advice. And good thing I did--the mix of adult and teenage points of view caught the attention of my eventual publisher!

3. Don't give up, but remember to take a break

I was accepted after 42 rejections. 42. What if I had stopped querying after the 39th or 40th rejection? 

What if your yes is just another query away? Can you push through those rejections, even if your journey has been a long one? 

But querying can take a toll on your confidence and emotional well-being. That's why I decided to stop querying for the months of November and December 2022. This break helped me return to querying in January 2023 in a better mental space. I received two more rejections before I received a yes from Future House Publishing.

4. Research, learn, and revise

There are many fantastic (and free!) resources on the internet to help you hone your manuscript and strengthen your query letter. I watched Youtube videos from Alyssa Matesic and used her advice to improve my query letter. Another great source on Youtube is Abbie Emmons. She a self-published novelist who has--in my opinion--the best writing advice I have found online. 

Other sources will offer their services for a fee. I don't think writers need these services to be successful, but it can be beneficial to receive specific feedback on your work. Remember to do your homework and properly vet anyone charging for their services--make sure their advice is worth your money. 


Querying is a hard path, but it can be rewarding. Keep striving for publication, give yourself breaks, and improve your craft. The world needs your words. 

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